Let's Talk about it!

Mental Health:

And why no one is talking about it!

We all have stuff that we don't talk about, but that does not mean its not still there. Let's not pretend that sometimes maybe even lately, our mental health is not an issue. I would know, I have experienced anxiety for myself, in different aspects of my life. As I have gotten older and wiser, I am more aware of my conscious and unconscious mind; and learning how to deal with the state of my mental health.

Mental health has been an ongoing national issue for a considerable amount of time, affecting people all over the world; regardless of race, ethnicity, sex, age group, culture etc... More importantly, some of us are so consumed into work, family, personal obligations etc... we don't always recognize the signs when we are the victims of mental health. 

Some of the signs include the following:

• Sleeping problems (Too much or too little)
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Fear
• Mood Changes (sadness, irritability, anger, headaches, inability to perform daily task) and many more (Mentalhealth.gov) 

Also, according to Mental Health of America,  more than 40 million Americans, have a mental health condition. Let's not wait until its too late to deal with our mental health. Think about all the good that could come out of good mental health practices; and taking action toward your mental ability to process things in a healthier way. Everyone has mental health, in which we all choose to deal with it differently. With that being said, Mental Health may stem from personal issues, the workplace, school and the most frightening of them all; the things we have absolutely no control over. The very person suffering from such a mental breakdown,is the one that is in such denial; or believes no one understands what he/she is experiencing.

No wonder why no one is really talking about it! So many people are walking around at work, in the school system, the community, in the household, and venting on social media with so much mental baggage; and deep down are struggling mentally, physically and emotionally to stay on track. Even worse the road of destruction; causing yourself harm or others.

Pursuing this further, i am no expert on this topic and only speaking from experience. From me to you, get it out! By acknowledging something has not been right up there for a long time, is one of the first steps towards dealing with your mental health. Dealing with the facts is key!Never feel embarrassed about the known, instead look forward to the unknown. 

If you need to get out that pint up energy, talk to someone. To God, a friend and or family member, mentor etc... and if you're unsure of talking about your personal business to others, write it out. Journaling has always been a reliable outlet for releasing toxic thoughts. Other things you can do are, read up on some inspirational blogs;) books, quotes, take yourself out on a date, take a personal day at work #MentalHealthDay lol, pick up a hobby or few, try to stay positive and get your mind right! My point is, you're not alone in this fight. Find a way to express yourself and communicate, without feeling too proud about what you're going through. We can all use a little help building ourselves up, after we have been fighting mentally to remain resilient.

-Kishari

Quote of the Day

"With power you create a permanent change, with force it is only temporary." -Iyanla Vanzant 

Are you Doing what you Love?

Are people still doing what they love anymore? That's a question i pose to myself sometimes. I have witnessed many people settling In careers, relationships, life decisions, personal journeys; in ways that has and will definitely effect their life. Life can become hard to manage at times, considering the lack of motivation, confidence and unemployment rates circulating in the world; making it hard for some people to continue to believe in something. In doing so, even putting some in the position to second guess themselves.

Pursuing something that's for you is not an easy journey. Some of us don't get it right the first time around, and so we say "we still have tomorrow" putting what we really want on the back burner. For instance, coming from experience there was a time in my life where i came to terms, that i wasn't doing what i loved; I was simply playing it safe. What was normal for most but very disturbing when you look at the big picture. What do i mean by that? I had a career in mind that i was pursuing, that was in high demand, job security, the ideal job. Something wasn't right! I could never stick with it consistently. It was almost as if i was trying to convince myself on it. I liked it but i didn't love it! Yes, of course over time you may think you can grow to love something, and that may be true in different aspects of your life; but truth is who are you really trying to convince, your mind or your heart.

There are some people out there in the world, who are content with where they are in life, confused about their path; hate their job or just in it for the wrong reasons etc... Then you have others who know what they want, love what they do and conquer through the ruff patches. I can't stress enough, the importance of having security in your life. Most people are always looking for a way out; which is a great thing but its also important to remember why you are doing something. Be the kind of person, who still wants to pursue what they love, that one thing that makes them feel free; without placing so much emphasis on the consequence, obstacles, hardships etc... If the passion is not there from the beginning, the heart will never follow it to greater things. liking something short-term  is never a good enough reason for doing something long-term; but loving it is a great reason to pursue it, see it through until its purpose is fulfilled.

The real question is, where do i start? Something as simple as writing it down. Putting all your thoughts, ideas, vision on paper and going from there. When you have good intentions and in the right mindset, all things work together for good.We must learn how to rebuild trust in ourselves and our ideas, because at the end of the day our instincts are all we have. Where there is purpose and passion, success will follow! Happiness comes from within you and in doing the things you love. In the meantime, continue to do what you love for as long as you can; God has a way with placing purpose where it belongs. 

-Kishari

Quote of the day!
We lose ourselves in things we love. We find ourselves there, too. -Kristin martz

A Good Thing

 

 

A Good Thing

 

 

As we go through life, we sometime come across great opportunities, amazing people, positive energy. On the other hand, you have the not so great opportunities, toxic people, and negative vibes heading in your direction. Truth is, we are always looking for that one thing? Whatever that is for you, setting out to find better and putting ourselves in the position to grow and excel above all our expectations. They say a good thing is hard to come by. Most of the time we know a good thing when we see it. That opportunity, person and positivity; but do we really challenge ourselves enough to know a good thing when we see it? Do we really stand behind a good thing theory wholeheartedly?

 

 

There are always good things out in the world that surrounds us and we are constantly reminded everyday of its existence. Especially of the beauty in all things good. We see the good in people, places and things and sometimes even see it in ourselves. Our first priority should always be to see the good in ourselves first, and also willing to see the good in others. I have personally been blessed with the ability to see the good in people and circumstances; in doing so, seeing the good in myself despite my faults. No, the process does not happen overnight and yes everyday is still a test from God. I sometimes have to question how I am even passing Gods test lol or why I'm still stuck on the same lesson. Somethings cannot be explained but I know I don't need to know all the answers right now. There is always a process to get to the good things. It takes patience, willingness, courage and much more; to be able to see the good in a new way.

 

 

When you find something good in this world, hold on to it for as long as you can. Everyday we make a choice on how we chose to see people , circumstances, obstacles etc... We don't always get to choose a good thing when we see it, those things takes time; But one day you'll choose right!

 

-Kishari

 

Quote of the Day!

"Sometimes a little change is a good thing." -Unknown

 

 

 



No One Teaches us how to Grieve

No One Teaches us how to Grieve:

The Grieving Process

We grieve! We grieve for ourselves, for our loved ones. No one really teaches us how to grieve. Everyone has a story behind every grieving process. Oh boy do we struggle, do we cry, do we linger and harbor, do we regret, do we laugh, do we not understand, are we weak, do we remember, do we hold memories, not like to accept it, do we feel, do we try to talk with them, do we miss our loved ones. I can go on for days on the daily struggles regarding the grieving process. For each and every individual the process will always be different; and until one experience that heartache firsthand, you wont truly understand the feeling one speaks of.

When people try to say they understand your pain, feelings, thoughts, soul; they have no idea. I think they have an ideal of what it might feel like; either from past experiences or trying to mentally interpret the feelings of others. Either way, none of us really knows what that is and how that feels for that person; but that person. We can rave about how we understand but we know nothing. What do I know? Nothing either! I was once that person who thought I could relate to what others were feeling. Saying what you should do to get through it, and not really understanding why people grieve for so long. Until one day i found myself on the other side in their shoes; and realized that was so not true. No one could tell me anything about my pain, feelings, thoughts, soul etc... My spirits were past its lowest point. Its an experience we all must face one day. We ask ourselves, what else do we have to go off of? Hoping that we can see that loved one again, talk with them, laugh with them, we'll take anything! From the time when life made sense, with them still with us.

One thing for sure and two things for certain, if God says we trust it, we trust it! He gives us time, strength and comfort to grieve. There is not a day that goes by, that i dont think of my loved ones that are no longer with me. Grieving on my own terms and trying to move forward at the same time. When we get close to people and form a connection and relationship with them, from that moment on the heart holds a special place specifically for that person. How do we really cope with something like this? A friend once said, "eventually, the time will pass."- Courtnie   I ask myself what does that even really mean for me? until the time actually started to pass and the healing process starting feeling a little bit better.

Even though we may feel sad, heart broken, lost etc... We are still able to move forward and continue on with our lives. We still have one of those days, moments where it still hits and hurt us; but we make do and we'll be okay. We still have that loved one sealed  in our hearts for life. Remembering their ways, how they made us feel, the memories, good times, the joy they bring, their smile, personality, physical presense. We remember them in all ways! Its amazes me how the things we remember, are the very things that help us get through the process. Life is short, communicate,forgive,love and grow with eachother.

-By Kishari Lomax

Qoute of the Day 

"When it comes to grief, the best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes, and let it go when we can." -Grey's Anatomy

I See Options in front of me

 

 

I See Options in front of me!

 

For some of us, its easiest to believe that we don't have any options; and or even in the bad stuff, rather than the good. I have always thought in the back of my mind, why do bad things happen to good people and the good things happen to the bad. That is still a question I sometimes pose to myself. We all wonder! When we continue to wonder why, we unconsciously allow life to keep moving without us. Focus your energy on the things that matter to you; because if you dont you take away from your options, actions, the will to grow into who you were meant to be.

 

If you think about it, nothing in this world really ever make sense. All we ever really do is go with the flow, wherever that is! In that moment of need, something starts to happen. I say, when God creates that connection with us, helping us figure out the things that happen for a reason is that someting. If something is a possibility, chances are it can still happen. There is still a chance, a chance to be open to and act on your options. My friend, the very moment you decide to let go of  the dead weight, regrets, other peoples opportunities, guilt trips, mistakes, the past; and anything else stopping you from utlizing your options; you are free.

 

To whomever it may concern or whatever it may be for you, make it happen! Do not think you dont have any options, because of your inability to see whats in front of you; and even your own potential. Sometimes we dont know a good thing going, from all the other chaos happening around us. Therefore, we have all these questions! How do i know i have options? What are those options? How do i utilize those options? Only you know what that is for you, through trial and erroring your life.

 

See here's the thing, you create those options the moment you start making better choices, choosing you, placing your energy into the right things and people, giving your story a meaning etc... Its all apart of the process and so you just trust it. In doing so, at any given moment your going to have allot of questions; and sometimes without answers. It is up to you to pursue those questions further and give them a new meaning. The answers to your questions!

 

-Kishari

 

 

Quote of the Day!

 "If i want my life to have a new meaning, let me pick thoughts and images that support who i am." -Iyanla Vanzant

 

 

 

 





 



Is Balance a myth?



Is Balance a Myth?

I'm assuming everyone could use a little balance in their lives right about now. I'm no stranger to the term balance. When I think of balance, I think of words such as stability and order. Having a stable mindset internally and externally, despite the chaos happening around us. Sometimes when I start my day, I wake up with a clear mindset. As I move further into the day, the possibility of a problem might surface. That's when everything starts to become unbalanced. So many things still need to get done, in so little time. When things are not in order and do not live up to our expectations, life feels out of order. You begin to think, how can I do x, y and z without taking from the other? In reality, there are a million things you want to accomplish but only get around to doing very few. When you try to do more than your body allows, it will let you know; that your mental, spiritual, emotional, physical levels are not on common grounds. We need all of the following to work together, for the true balance we seek to be effective.    

What do you do? We do what we always do, we make due of our circumstances; I think that's all we ever do. We take risk in everything we do, in which nothing in this life is guaranteed. Therefore, we must trail an error just like everyone else; so that you can get a feel for what works for you. Life is short! In its short time, we must come to terms that stuff just happens. When your way does not happen, its not the end of the world. An old friend once said, "You don't have to start over, just keep going. -Antoinette Whatever that may be for you. So I say once again, is balance a myth? To me, absolutely not. Balance is a way of living, that in due time you must figure out what that is for you; and how to maintain it.To be honest, I'm still trying to figure this thing out for myself; I'm just riding the wave and learning as I go.

-Kishari