No One Teaches us how to Grieve:
The Grieving Process
We grieve! We grieve for ourselves, for our loved ones. No one really teaches us how to grieve. Everyone has a story behind every grieving process. Oh boy do we struggle, do we cry, do we linger and harbor, do we regret, do we laugh, do we not understand, are we weak, do we remember, do we hold memories, not like to accept it, do we feel, do we try to talk with them, do we miss our loved ones. I can go on for days on the daily struggles regarding the grieving process. For each and every individual the process will always be different; and until one experience that heartache firsthand, you wont truly understand the feeling one speaks of.
When people try to say they understand your pain, feelings, thoughts, soul; they have no idea. I think they have an ideal of what it might feel like; either from past experiences or trying to mentally interpret the feelings of others. Either way, none of us really knows what that is and how that feels for that person; but that person. We can rave about how we understand but we know nothing. What do I know? Nothing either! I was once that person who thought I could relate to what others were feeling. Saying what you should do to get through it, and not really understanding why people grieve for so long. Until one day i found myself on the other side in their shoes; and realized that was so not true. No one could tell me anything about my pain, feelings, thoughts, soul etc... My spirits were past its lowest point. Its an experience we all must face one day. We ask ourselves, what else do we have to go off of? Hoping that we can see that loved one again, talk with them, laugh with them, we'll take anything! From the time when life made sense, with them still with us.
One thing for sure and two things for certain, if God says we trust it, we trust it! He gives us time, strength and comfort to grieve. There is not a day that goes by, that i dont think of my loved ones that are no longer with me. Grieving on my own terms and trying to move forward at the same time. When we get close to people and form a connection and relationship with them, from that moment on the heart holds a special place specifically for that person. How do we really cope with something like this? A friend once said, "eventually, the time will pass."- Courtnie I ask myself what does that even really mean for me? until the time actually started to pass and the healing process starting feeling a little bit better.
Even though we may feel sad, heart broken, lost etc... We are still able to move forward and continue on with our lives. We still have one of those days, moments where it still hits and hurt us; but we make do and we'll be okay. We still have that loved one sealed in our hearts for life. Remembering their ways, how they made us feel, the memories, good times, the joy they bring, their smile, personality, physical presense. We remember them in all ways! Its amazes me how the things we remember, are the very things that help us get through the process. Life is short, communicate,forgive,love and grow with eachother.
-By Kishari Lomax
Qoute of the Day
"When it comes to grief, the best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes, and let it go when we can." -Grey's Anatomy
